Ponyboy's Mind Has Left The Building
by ShotgunOpera13
Summary: Just a dumb thing I thought up because of a conversation. The wind can slurp...and Pony has lost his mind. What's poor Darry to do? The story is now rated T due to "mild" language... "
1. The Wind Can Slurp!

"Ya know what, Superman?", Two-Bit asked.

"What?", Darry asked cautiously. This could NOT end well. Like that time Two-Bit asked him if he was gay because he didn't have girlfriend.

"The wind....it can slurp.", Two-Bit told him.

"Huh?", Darry replied dumbly. Ponyboy, who had been dozing on the couch, suddenly sat up.

"Yeah Dar, wanna hear the story?", Pony began the story without waiting for a reply.

"It all started when the 5th Starbucks opened. Mario and Luigi fell from the sky riding pink unicorns. Barney burned down all the schools in America because Elmo told him they hated the color purple. Then Shrek invented Bakugan while Mario and Luigi bought 2 Cokes, which back then was called root beer, which back then contained real beer, and, not to mention, cocaine. Then, Mario used a straw and the wind slurped up all the Coke away. The world temporarily ended when the Teletubbies shot each other with water guns, which back then shot nuclear bombs. Mario and Luigi were eaten by the monster under the bed, AKA Brittney Spears, who was eaten by the Boogeyman, who was eaten by Chuck Norris. Then Gerard Way became the ruler of the world and all the rappers exploded. So did Whinny the Poo....and that's how the wind began to slurp.", Pony finished with a sigh.

"Um, Pony....do you need to go to the hospital?, Darry asked, slightly alarmed.

"Why would I need to go to the hospital?", Pony replied, confused

"I think there's something wrong with your brain. I also think-". That was as far as Darry got before a full-blown pillow war began.


	2. The Psychiatrist

After the "little episode", as Darry called it, happened, Darry took Ponyboy to a psychiatrist.

(flashback)

"But why do I have to go Dar?", Pany asked.

"You know why, Pone. Remember the 'wind can slurp' story you told?", Darry told him firmly.

"Dar, I don't know what came over me! I've said that!"

"I don't care, your going and that's finial!", Darry told him firmly. His patience had been had grown tired of that subject.

(end flashback)

They pulled into the parking lot of Dr. Palmer's office at about 3;45. Two-Bit, who had tagged along, lagged behind, messing with something in his back pocket. Pony and Darry just assumed it was his beloved switchblade. After explaining to Dr. Palmer that Ponyboy was his real name, Pony sat down to take a few tests.

"So, Ponyboy, what do you see int his ink splotch?", Dr. Palmer asked patiently

"A blue sky.", Pony replied.

Dr. Palmer stared at the _black and white _ink splotch in confusion. He turned back to Pony, them back at the ink splotch before asking, "How is this blue?"

"Well this is the story of how the sky is blue...

"Long ago, when the world was first created, there was no sky. Then one day, Barney looked up and said 'What the fuck, there's no sky!' The other dinosaurs just laughed before going extinct, but that's a story for another time. Soon, Sesame Street fell from the sky, sent by Satin, rom the unknown far away planet on Disneyland. Not long after, a pair of giant converse fell from the sky. They belonged to Robert Patterson and they were hot pink. They later spontaneously combusted. Blue(from Blue's Clues) stabbed Steve(from Blue's Clues) to death, then watched Yo Gabba Gabba with the Wonder Pets. God randomly decided to make a cake, and spilled a ton of blue food coloring everywhere. Because of the chaos He created, God made Chuck Norris and Y-Gi-Oh to 'straighten things out'. The End.", Pony stared at himself in shock.

"Well, that was...interesting.", Dr. Palmer looked quite surprised himself,

"I have NO idea where that came from..."


	3. The Scan

Disclaimer: I've finally figured out how to put these on here! Yay! Anyway, I no own, you no sue. ^^

A/N: Alright, let me put it this way, for all you flamers. No one forced you to read this story! So listen up and listen good. I. DON'T. CARE! Those of you who review for ABSOLUTELY NO REASON, just to criticize me for what I write, YOU GUYS ARE JACKASSES! STAY OFF MY STORY!

"Alright Pone. I've had it. The doc's only got a guess about what's wrong with you. The doc says something's up with your brain, so, oh happy day, you get an CAT scan.", Darry stated, his voice dripping with sarcasm. Two-Bit, who had been oddly quiet on the couch, hid a grin and reached into his pocket to touch his metallic masterpiece.

"But Darry, I mean it! I just don't know!", Pony told him, exasperated because he'd told him, time after time.

"Yeah, well we're about to find out."

TIMESKIP

"Don't worry Ponyboy.", the nurse said after verifying his name. Pony didn't say a word as his head was pushed under the machine.

TIMESKIP AGAIN

"Mr. Curtis, to be truthful, we have found the problem, but have no idea how it came to be.", his confused tone worried Pony and Darry.

"A metal chip inserted in his brain."

Darry turned to Pony and asked the question on everyone's mind. "Ponyboy Michael Curtis, how the hell did you get a metal chip in your brain?"

"I dunno."

TIMESKIP AGAIN AGAIN

"Think this has anything to do with Two-Bit?"

"Yes."

TIMESKIP FOR THE LAST TIME

When the Curtis brothers got home, they were in for a shock. Johnny was on the couch while Dally danced and sang 'I'm Walking on Sunshine'

Yeah this definitely has something to do with Two-Bit Matthews, who is nowhere to be found.

Aw shit.


	4. Where the Hell'd he Go!

A/N: I'm BACK! To everyone who thought that I forgot about this story, guess what? I HAVEN'T! YAY!

Disclaimer: I don't own the Outsiders. Only these (very stupid) ideas

"Where. The. Hell. Did. He. Go?" Ponyboy Curtis half yelled. He had been pacing the floor for about an hour now. Steve had gotten annoyed after about 2 seconds and had left. Darry was probably in the kitchen, making lunch. Earlier, (before he stormed out), they had told Steve about the chip in Pony's brain.

FLASHBACK

Steve was shocked, to say the least. Now he finally had proof. He cleared his throat before speaking, "I know why he has that chip in his brain," Two pairs of eyes locked on him before he continued, "He's a robot, he's always had that chip!"

"I am NOT a robot! Am I?" Pony looked to Darry for the answer.

"…"

Me: The world may never know.

Steve: Now you're just ripping off that Tootsie Pop thing!

Me: So what? This is a Fanfic! May I remind you… *holds up sledgehammer*

Steve: *Cowers in fear* in the background: Pony: Go Dei! Kill him!

Me: Ah the trusty sledgehammer…

END FLASHBACK

"Pony, will you stop pacin' before ya wear a hole in the floor," Darry yelled form behind, "Damnit, I'm too late." Pony looked down to see a 3 in. rut in the floor.

"Sorry Superman."

Darry sighed as he sat down on the couch. 'I need to find Two-Bit so I can beat the holy shit out of him.' Darry continued to think of all the evil ways to torture Two-Bit Matthews.

Me: Darry, you can be sooooooo evil sometimes! *Points at thought bubble of Two-Bit with his ass on fire*

Darry: Yeah, well… *Pokes thought bubble with a needle* *POP*

Me: Damn. That was funny. Anyway I still love you.

Darry: I don't know whether to be happy or creeped out, Dei. O.o

Me: *sighs* Whatever. Back to the story, or I'll go on and on and o- *Gets slapped by Alex*

Me: Whoa. Alex! When did you get here?

Alex: I've been sitting beside you this entire time! *unintelligible mutters*

Me: Hey I heard you call me a *BLEEP* and a *BLEEPIN'* *BLEEP* O.o

Suddenly sirens were heard blaring outside. Pony and Darry, dismissing the disturbance as 'normal', took their time getting to the door. What they saw shocked them into stillness. Two-Bit was being chased by the fuzz. Well, that was normal, but…this was a high speed car chase. And it was clear that he was gonna lose, even before he drove straight into a *dramatic music* GIANT BLACK HOLE! Pony and Darry just stared.

A/N: *Two-Bit fangirls maul me* DON'T WORRY FOLKS! TWO-BIT'S ALWAYS GOT SOMETHING UP HIS SLEEVE! As always, requests are accepted and reviews make my day! Next update 8/28/10. SEE YA THEN FOLKS! By the way, the next chapter is THE END!


	5. THE END!

A/N: Well folks, we finally made it. Last chapter. I wanna say thanks to those who supported me throughout my first fanfic. This meant a lot. *Takes a bow*

Disclaimer: By the last chapter, you should know that I don't own. But I do own my new 2 GB iPod shuffle! And something else…

Two days after the 'accident' with the black hole, everyone was still in shock. Except for Dallas, that is.

FLASHBACK

"And then, he drove right into a giant black hole!" Pony exclaimed, his eyes frightened. Darry nodded, looking a bit scared himself.

Me: Awww Darry, do you need a hug?

Darry: Dei, are we really gonna start this again?

Me: *Stares at the floor* But-

Darry: No 'buts' *Holds up ax*

Katie: Don't kill her! She has to tell the story!

Alex: Kill her, kill her, kill her!

Katie: *Glares at Alex and Darry*

Darry: *Sighs and drops ax*

Me: *Sighs in relief*

"Whoa.", Soda and Steve said in unison. Dally just glared.

"You honestly believe that crap? You've got to be kidding." Dally spat. 'Now that the monkey's gone, I can watch all the Hannah Montana I want.' He thought to himself.

END FLASHBACK

Now Dal was sitting on the sofa, torturing Pony by making him watch the Hannah Montana marathon.

"C'mon Dally, lemme go!"

"Nope."

As you should know, Pony was tied to a chair by Valentine Thornton, who currently sat beside him, eating popcorn. The door suddenly slammed open and banged shut.

"Two-Bit! Why do ya always have ta slam the door?" Pony yelled more out of reflex than anything.

"Cause I wanna." Two-Bit Matthews replied, stepping into the room. Everyone just gaped.

"What?"

"You, you drove into a black hole…I saw it!"

"Was the guy a little bit taller than me?"

"Yeah."

"That was my twin brother One-Bit."

"Oh."

A/N: Well, that's the end! Hopefully next week I'll have April Fools! Dude It's June done. Then look for my new story, Shoot College Sucks. If you look really deep, you can see the meaning. Especially after the first chapter.


End file.
